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Dear Middle School Parents:
We are just beginning to absorb the tragic news coming out of Connecticut. We did not discuss this at all at school today, so we are aware that difficult conversations will be taking place at home this weekend. Our counselor, Michelle Parker, has pulled together some points that may be helpful to you.
Sally

In the wake of today's tragic shooting in Connecticut, we thought it might be useful to provide you with some pointers on how to talk to your kids about these events. If, after following the guidelines listed below, you are at all worried about your child, please do not hesitate to contact me. I will try to check my email more frequently than I usually do on weekends.
Michelle
Talking to Your Children About the School Shooting in Connecticut

* Don't avoid the topic. It is quite likely if your child has access to the internet that they know about it. It is best if you ask them what they know and create a safe place in which they can express their thoughts and feelings. Encourage them to convey their own reactions by asking them what their thoughts are, how events like this make them feel, and what worries they may have when they hear about events such as this.

* Know that, whether they are able to express it or not, the natural reaction for children in the face of such senseless tragedies is to worry about their own safety. It is important that you acknowledge that bad things can sometimes happen in our world, but that you also provide very specific reassurance about their immediate safety. Reassure them of everything that all the adults around them do to ensure their safety. If they ask questions like "Can something like that happen at our school?" remind them that while these attacks get a lot of press, they are REALLY quite infrequent and uncommon . Remind them, as well, that their school has a lot of safety measures in place to keep strangers from entering and to keep them safe.

* Keep in mind that kids may process events and feelings at different rates. While I would try to limit excessive rehashing of the news, I would stay open to the possibility that they may need to process things over the next few days.

* While most kids' interest in this will likely dissipate over the next couple of days, there may be a few kids who, for a variety of reasons and/or vulnerabilities may be more affected by a tragedy such as this. If you are at all worried about your child, please call me!

* Some possible signs of distress to look for are:

1. Change in mood

2. Change in sleep or eating habits

3. Out of character signs of restlessness or hyperactivity

4. Excessive worrying

5. Nightmares

6. Out of character appearance of physical symptoms such as stomach aches or headaches

7. Decreased interest in activities they used to enjoy.

* If you would like to read further information, the following links might be helpful:
http://www.massgeneral.org/children/about/newsarticle.aspx?id=3647
http://www.apa.org/helpcenter/aftermath.aspx
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15109195/ns/health-childrens_health/t/how-talk-your-kids-about-shootings/